Sonnet
Just as modern as ancient, a dose of the gripes
Bowels like an open sewer, too slackened to close
Be it leaves, old newspaper or classic wipes
The focus dear reader is on the bottom’s prose
Days of flatulence, days of liquid conker brown
In this life of celebrity and instant pleasure
People are confused by my intensive frown
Throw in dazed self-esteem for good measure:
What greater fear than from these real doubts?
Whether my undies will be soiled or clear
For I am indeed famous for managing these bouts
Controlling my destiny, controlling my fear
How it began is no longer a concern
By seeking relief, I’ve got humility to learn.
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